Econo Lodge
by Shooshkipoo
Summary: Sam and Dean have stayed at some pretty crappy motels, but this one takes the cake.


Disclaimer: I don't own Sam and Dean; which is really a shame. I'm really glad I don't own this hotel though.

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"King-size bed?" asked the clerk innocently.

"No," Dean snapped, more aggressively than he meant to, but really having a cracked rib tended to make one rather cranky. "Two queens would be just great." The clerk bit her lip, looking a little put-off.

"I have a room with two singles available." She offered after a few minutes.

"Fine!"

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Sam and Dean staggered to their room, already half asleep. Dean, as well as having a cracked rib was also sporting a magnificent lump on the side of his head, and an impressive number of bruises. Sam on the other hand, had a dislocated shoulder, a split lip and a sprained ankle. That last hunt had been a BITCH.

"That last hunt was a bitch!" groaned Dean collapsing on the bed. Sam nodded in agreement, to weary to say anything. Sitting down on his own bed, Sam mumbled

"Before you pass out, mind helping me with my shoulder?" Dean sighed, but got up.

"Ok Sammy, on three." Sam sucked in a breath.

"One," _Snap!_ Sam's shoulder shifted back into place. He let out an involuntary gasp of pain.

"You're an ass, you know that?"

"Yeah, I know that. Give me a sec to find the bandages and then I'll wrap that ankle of yours, Wuss."

"I'm not a wuss!" Sam huffed.

Dean knelt down beside his duffel, wincing. As he dug through the bag for the first-aid kit, a speck of movement caught his eye. A little black ant was crawling across the floor. Dean crushed it, frowning when the thing still wasn't dead.

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to kill an ant."

"And that ant seems to be winning."

"Shut up." Dean finally succeeded in killing the ant. Before he got back to Sam, he saw yet another one. This one he made quick work of with his steel-toe boot.

Dean was about to kneel in front of Sam to wrap his ankle when Sam pointed at something on the floor.

"I wouldn't go there if I were you." Dean looked, there was some stinky pink crap stuck in the carpet.

"I _really _hope that's gum." Sam shuffled backwards so Dean could sit on the bed. Dean finished wrapping Sam's ankle.

"Tight enough?" Sam stood, testing it.

"Yep." Sitting back down, Sam helped his brother remove his shirt and wrapped his rib.

"That better?" asked Sam when he finished.

"Uh huh," Dean yawned. "Dibs on the bathroom."

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Fighting to keep his eyes open, Dean filled a cup with tap water and drained it. He took out his toothbrush and added some toothpaste to it, not bothering to turn off the tap. He was about to stick his brush under the tap when he took a good look at the water. The water was brown! Dean shuddered, remembering the glass he had just drunk. In his disgust, he knocked the cup to the floor. Cursing, he bent down to pick it up. Under the counter, were a fair number of dead bugs. Some of them quite large.

Almost positive he didn't want to see the results; Dean ripped off a piece of toilet paper and wiped the counter. The tissue was now a lovely shade of brown.

"Sammy," Dean called, "I wouldn't use this bathroom if I were you, its frikken nasty."

"Yeah," Sam replied tersely, "come see these beds." Dean left the filthy bathroom to see his little brother standing beside one of the beds looking disgusted.

Dean raked an eye over it; it looked fine at first glance, but a second look showed a brownish tinge to the sheets.

"It gets better," said Sam flipping over the pillow. This time it was more than a tinge. Now completely awake, the brothers scoured the room. The towels in the bathroom had brown stains, the showerhead was moldy; Dean was now very relieved that he hadn't thought to use the toilet. There was more pink goop on the carpet, white stains on the wall, ("That's definitely _not_ gum," Dean shuddered,) and more ants.

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"We can clean the room if you'd like." The Winchesters gaped.

"Ma'am," said Sam in a voice of forced calm, "Its 3:00 in the morning. Don't you have any cleaner rooms available?"

"I'm afraid not, sir. We're booked solid." replied the perky clerk. Sam and Dean exchanged looks.

"I think we'll just head out then," said Dean.

"Oh, well in that case that will be $30."

"Excuse me?" asked Sam, dumbfounded.

"We charge by the hour." Explained the clerk, smiling.

"Of course you do." Sam shot a warning glance at his brother.

"Ok, just let us pack up our stuff and we'll be right back."

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The Impala sped down the road, leaving the Econo Lodge in the rearview mirror.

"We can clean the room," sneered Dean, "I don't think that place even HAS a washing machine." Sam grinned,

"In that case, I wonder how long it will take for them to find the comment card." Sam and Dean both laughed, their fatigue forgotten.

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The maid knocked tentatively on the door. There was no answer. She opened the door and walked in. Her mouth dropped open in shock; the window was open, with the sheets tied together as a rope. She saw the comment card lying on the dresser, with a fair amount of writing on it. She picked it up and began to read.

_Dear Econo Lodge,_

_If I get an STD from using your bathroom, I'm holding you personally responsible.___This is the most disgusting hotel we've ever stayed in. _Wanna know why?_

_-There are dead bugs all over the floor in the bathroom. Hello, it's called a broom!_

_-pink crap stuck in the carpets. If you can identify what it is, you deserve the Nobel Prize. _

_-dirt on the towels, sheets and pillowcase. Newsflash, turning the pillow over doesn't make it any cleaner._

_-white stains on the wall. Unfortunately, we all know what that is._

The maid blinked in surprise, there was a black smudge on the paper, circled with an arrow pointing to it.

_P.S. Get rid of the ants!_

End.

A/N: Hello! Random story I felt like writing. The funny thing is, even though I'm exaggerating a little, this story is based on true events! The room I stayed at really did have dirty towels, sheets, pink stains on the carpet, bugs in the bathroom and tons of ants. My favourite was that they actually did turn over the pillow case instead of cleaning it! So yeah, Econo Lodge is disgusting. The one I stayed at anyway. Needless to say, we didn't spend the night. Hope you enjoyed it. Read and review SVP.

-Shooshkipoo


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